Old Yeller

Barack Obama will save Old Yeller.

Because he loved that dog so goddamn much.

i can haz?

Barack Obama will make cheeseburgers healthy.

"Go ahead, Big Fella!"

But he'll also make french fries taste like lima beans, just to keep us on our toes.

action figures

Barack Obama will go back in time and get you all those AWESOME 80's ACTION FIGURES that you always wanted.

click the pic for a closer look

"Don't worry, no Gobots!"

If you enjoyed this check out retroist for more of the same.

open with confidence

Barack Obama will make sure you don't get any crap presents this year.

"Tacky candles, polyester ties, those science kits that take hours to assemble but only light up a tiny lightbulb when you're done -- these, my friends, are the gifts of yesteryear. Once I take I office, there will be a diamond ring in every stocking and seven nintendo wiis under every christmas tree."