net savvy

Barack Obama will facebook your internet.

"Wow!! It's so much better now!"

special thanks to Alexander Hope for the tip-off

one cup

Barack Obama's cup is always at least half full, even when it's completely empty.

"Watch! I'll drink it again!"

jew wish

Barack Obama will make Santa Claus give presents to Jews.

"Just a few more Hebrew schools to visit and then I'll have the CIA release Mrs. Claus."

muffins

Crunch time at work? Things getting testy around the coffee maker? Don't Worry!
Barack Obama will smooth things over with a batch of freshly baked muffins. __
___

"mmm..."

visionary

Barack Obama toilet-trained this child.

O-balm-a

Rub Barack Obama on your skin, twice daily, and you'll see immediate results.

ballin

Barack Obama will fix your mechanics by demonstrating his silky-smooth jump shot.