daylight savings

Barack Obama will rejig daylight savings time so you get an extra hour of sleep in the fall AND in the spring.

jabbarackeez

Barack Obama is the real reason that Jabbawockeez is America's Best Dance Crew.

"I did it for all 'a y'all."

honey-roasted?

Barack Obama IS the deal with airline peanuts.

filial piety

Barack Obama will make your children appreciate you.

Wow, Dad!
How did you learn so much
about double-entry bookkeeping?

get out of jail free...

Barack Obama will send every American a prepared list of convenient excuses.